And now, a track off the flip side

zara's picture

Sinus headaches have started again. I need to remind myself to call the doctor and get my Flonaise refilled. I keep saying this whenever the office is closed and I can't do anything about it and then I get caught up in my day and forget to call when it can do me any good.

That pedestrian observation aside, I thought that I would attempt to demonstrate that I'm not always a ball of negativity and whining.

The idea to do this occurred to me when I was using one of my favorite melancholy diversions this morning. Most of the things that I do to cheer myself up border the self-destructive, but I keep trying to think up as many ways as I can to keep myself from dwelling on shit that I allow to bother me.

I call this the Misty Factor. Try to be happy. Don't allow yourself to be angry all the time. Misty, if you hadn't heard me tell you this enough already, you're a bigger inspiration in my life than you might realize.

So... *ramble, ramble, ramble* the following is a list of things that I do to cheer myself up.

* I will keep The Fratellis' "Costello Music" on repeat for the day. I crank it up in my Nano and let it rip. It's pretty consistently upbeat, diverting me from thinking about shit that I shouldn't. I've been playing them every morning this week and even if it's for only the length of time that it takes me to do pick-ups in the morning, that's still one less hour of me being a ball of anxiety, frustration or anger. Or all three.

* Tummy time. It's supposed to be that thing that you do with babies, laying them out on their bellies so that they learn to gain strength in their neck muscles. It's also because you have to put them on their backs when they sleep (giving all young babies that lovely bald spot on the back of their heads) and during the day they need some change.

Well, the perspective from the ground is a good one, even if you're grown up. I'll stretch out on my stomach outside and read. Or on the carpet, listening to Midget struggle through a book that she's learning to read. Or we'll color in a coloring book, her on one page and me on the opposite one, only me coloring from the upside down angle. Tummy time will make you forget how shitty a day is. When you're literally that low, everything looks up.

* Buying a box of cereal that I haven't eaten before. Have you ever noticed how many fucking brands there are these days? You can spend an hour going through the different varieties, reading nutritional labels alone. I usually like to find a box that has a toy in so that I can torment Midget by telling her that it's MY toy and make her do something goofy to persuade me to give it to her. (I once asked her to find a picture of an alien in one of the magazines we have in the house - we've got TONS - and it kept both of us amused for quite some time.) The nice part is that if the cereal is gross, there's always someone else in this house who will end up eating it. One of the few upsides to living at home with two adult-aged younger sisters.

* (Thinking about how I need to think of more things that don't include Midget, since I understand that not everyone has a Midget to do these things with, but most of the things that I like to do involve her.) Midget nail salon. She gets a bottle of nail polish, nail file and buffer and pretends that she's a beautician, giving me manicures and pedicures. It tickles like fuck sometimes, but that's half the fun. This is something that I think dads should do with their daughters. If you're afraid of people seeing your fingernails, at least let them give you pedicures.

* One of my all-time favorite things to do when I was a kid was to tear things apart just to see what they were made of. I still go to thrift stores and buy the least expensive corded phones, old clock radios and other small kitchen appliances. Then I get out a couple of screwdrivers and a hammer, go outside and "disassemble." I'm actually rather destructive as a whole. Anything that I can tear apart, from living things like plants (I'll pull off all the leaves and then pull the stem out of the center of the leaf and rip them apart) to my shoes (I currently have a rhinestone linked chain in my mouth that came off a pair of flip flops that I have). I highly recommend trying to find a junk yard that will let you bang on things. I once knew someone who knew someone and I got a chance to take a bat and beat the fuck out of a wrecked car. That shit feels GOOD.

* Repetitive tasks are good for keeping me occupied. People have always been surprised at how much I love to alphabetize and file things. While I know not everyone can do it, when I'm having a bad day, I'll get into MatchFlick's database and add the entire list of crappy direct-to-video movies that some unknown B-movie actor has been in. Not only does the repetitive nature of it relax me, I learn a lot about actors that most people have never heard of. This won't make me "happy" but it will distract me long enough to forget that I was sad/upset.

* I call Stuart and try to come up with a unique voicemail message. I used to talk to Stuart on a regular basis, me always being bored in the middle of the night and he being one of the few people I knew who was up that late as well (even though I'm west coast and he's three hours ahead of me). Now that he works the graveyard shift, I know that if I call him, I'll get his voicemail. So I try to think of something clever. I don't always succeed. But when I manage to come up with something interesting, I feel strangely accomplished.

I think it might be a good idea if I end there. Mainly because the fucking lousy wireless router is pulling its bullshit again. Or perhaps it's the crappy cable modem shit. In either case, it gets me pissed. Which kind of defeats the purpose of this entry.


kiki's picture



I miss that I have a new number, I don't hear from him ever...sad.

luckymslucy's picture


Hey Miss Zara! Remember me? I havent forgot about ya, just havent been around lately! Anyway, boy, I have missed your rants! And I only know of Misty from you, but you hit it on the head with the "Misty Factor!", that chic has style and grace. I would love to be more positive like her. Anyway, you will see more of me, Ive missed the awesome one. :)
Be safe!

lrk1977's picture

Misty is inspiring . . .

Her happy, bubbly positivity is hard not to notice. :) I also love how she owns being sexy! RAWR!

I love your list and I think maybe I need to do something similar. :) Thank you for sharing! Oh, and try doing a pedicure with Midget x's 2! It's almost torture rather than ticklish! lol

Lesley from Minnesota :)

Mmm. For a second there,

Mmm. For a second there, when you were talking about your favorite diversion, I thought you were talking about a dildo of some kind. I just couldn't figure out why that would be melancholy.

mistylou69's picture

You sure do know how to make a girl feel special!

As I've told you before I'm super happy that I inspire you to be happier, but this really topped the cake! I know you've told me that before and I've been cheesy and a little *blush blush giggle giggle* about it, but wow! I didn't know I really inspired you this much! I rock! Hehe!

I think those are all wonderful ideas to keep your mood on the upside! :) I like to listen to really enpowering girl, just anything that makes you feel like you can kick anybody's ass and you're on top of the world. There are several that make me feel that way. One new one that I've found recently is that Pink song called Just You and Your Hand Tonight...or something like that. Although, that song might make you think of an still makes me feel enpowered. :)

I try to think of it like this: If I'm unhappy it's only hurting myself. Making myself miserable dwelling on things that I can't change is pointless...and even being mad only makes me doesn't hurt the person I'm mad know? It's kind of hard to explain, but it makes sense to me. :)

Keep thinking good thoughts, Zara, you are making great progress! Love you girl!


SimplySam's picture

"The Misty Factor" That is so PERFECT!

When I am in a funk...

I often think of this really awesome writer who did a piece called, "50 Awesome Things You Might Not Know About Me" that she was challenged to do by someone else.

When I saw that, I challenged myself to do my own. It has been my own personal project for several months now, actually. I think I am finally up to 44? Best. Challenge. Ever. This makes me focus on ME and my personal positives instead of all the negatives that want to take over so easily.

THAT is one of my favorite "Misty Factors!"

jomadd's picture

I am affraid to try that

I am affraid to try that one. How devistating would it be to only have one or two. That would just make it worse. Got anything else?

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