Building Friction (Part 24)

Sean returned on Sunday from seeing his parents back East, and filled us in on the status of his family. He was signed on to do a show the Monday after returning, a minor gig at a small venue that ended up only being attended by me. We sat around outside of the place, smoking cigarettes and talking. I told him about the fight between Matt and Geoff.

"I'm not surprised. It was bound to happen," Sean was reclined in his chair, looking up at the sky.

"It's not something that you would have done," I replied.

"True. But I'm better than most guys. Actually, I just don't give a shit about that stuff. If a girl blows me off, why bother chasing her around? Fucking waste of time." He looked very tired.

"There isn't a point where you would fight for a girl? Even if you really loved her?" I asked, sitting forward and staring at the side of his face.

"Hell no," he countered, not looking over. "There's always more girls. No point in getting torn up over one who clearly has no interest in being with me." It was then that he looked over. "Although, you kind of fucked that part up. I'm still disappointed in you about that."

I sighed. "Yeah, I know. But you're disappointed in me about a lot of things."

"Not really," Sean returned his gaze to the night sky. "Most of the time I couldn't give a fuck. Although I put on a good show that I do. It's your life to lead and to fuck up however you want. As long as it doesn't affect me, I really couldn't care less. But yes, I was disappointed in you with the bathroom thing. You're better than that."

"Fine. Let's say you're right. Let's say I'm better than that. Then why am I getting so fucking frustrated with Matt for wanting to take things slow? Shouldn't I be proud of myself for holding out?" I threw my spent cigarette to the ground and instantly went to light another one. "But I just... UNH!" I gestured wildly with my hands, strangling the air in front of me. "I wanna fuck him and get it over with already!"

"It hasn't even been all that long for you guys. I was gone 2 weeks. You're not even at a month yet, are you?" He wrestled the lighter out of my clenched hands and lit my smoke for me.

"Just about that, yeah," I dismally replied.

"That's nothing. Sure, you've started the fooling around already, and you've escalated everything into an actual relationship. If you'd been smarter about it, you would have just casually dated the guy. Only on the weekends or something. Only going out, nothing at your house. So you can't backtrack now. You've painted yourself into a corner." Sean paused and lit a new cigarette for himself. "The way I see it, either you're going to have to stand there and wait patiently for the paint to dry before you walk out and then finish the job. OR... you'll have to walk on the fresh paint. Which is just going to fuck it up."

"So wait then?" I questioned.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Chloe! I'm not here to make your decisions for you! Fuck, that pisses me off! You're so good at having opinions and sharing them with thousands of people, but when it comes to this relationship shit, you're a fucking retard! You rely on everyone else to come to some kind of collective decision about what you do. As much as I hate it, and as much as it made me think less of you, fucking that guy spontaneously was probably the first thing you've done without having everyone hold your hand. Why are you like this?" Sean stopped and poked a finger at me.

I braced myself back against my chair. "Like what?"

"So fucking contradictory! Make up your damn mind who you're going to be. Either you need us all the time and you stop writing about how you think this and that about stuff. Or you start employing all those opinions and make your own damn decisions! There's no two ways about it. You just can't be both." Sean settled back and looked at the sky again. I didn't say much to him after that. There would have been no point. He was done talking to me about it, and there really wasn't anything left to say. Sean was never one to pull punches or sugar coat things for me. It was one of the things that I appreciated about him.

I drove home that night thinking about what he'd said. Mainly, my mind stuck on the term he'd chosen to use. Contradictory. The very thing that Geoff had professed to be so interested in. So supposedly enamored with. My nature had always been of two sides. One part of me was quiet and reserved, allowing the other bold personalities in my life to be in the forefront while I watched them in awe. Steph was one of them. I could never get over how powerful she could be when expressing herself. There were never any doubts as to where she was coming from when she spoke.

I could also be very bold and outspoken. Subjects that I enjoyed and excelled at were ones that no one could match me at. I could talk for days about writing, movies, pop culture. That side of me tended to come out when I knew I could dominate. In those moments I had the ability to own a room like Steph. The problem was that maintaining that persona was difficult. I wasn't always a loud mouth. Sometimes I liked to sit back. Sometimes I actually preferred it. And there were people who expected me to always be loud and boisterous. It was too much for me to take. Those were the times that I would retreat. I fought internally with myself on a daily basis, trying to find a balance of who exactly I was.

When I returned home, there was an e-mail from a friend of mine who worked for a movie review website. He'd sent me notification of a Wes Anderson double feature that was going to be playing at a small local theater in town on Thursday. He'd called ahead and reserved a couple of seats for me. I replied to his message, sending him my thanks. There were a few other random messages, mostly from readers of my column, and none needed a return response, so I quietly shut down the computer and went to sleep.

Matt called me the next day to happily inform me that he'd gotten a promotion. He'd been made first assistant manager of his store, and was hoping to get out and celebrate, but ended up getting stuck with a closing shift.

"Maybe we can hit that Anderson double feature as a little celebration on Thursday. A friend of mine already had seats reserved for me," I mentioned.

"That sounds good. I was really hoping to see you before that, but the way that things are turning out, it looks like Thursday might actually be my first time slot open. I'm off that day, but tomorrow and then through the rest of the weekend, I'm working." He sounded tired just telling me about it.

"OK, well I will get you popcorn and snackage and anything else you might want," I lowered my voice and hoped he would pick up on the cue.

On the other end of the line there was a crash. "Oh, FUCK! Some kid just knocked over the IAMS display. I need to go. I really wish people would watch their damn kids in here." With that, Matt clicked the conversation closed.

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"I'm not going to be able to make it," the voice on the other end of the line sounded defeated. "Aaron called in sick again and I'm fucking stuck for coverage. I need to close. I'm sorry, Chloe."

Matt's call came at a quarter to four in the afternoon. I'd spoken with him over my lunch hour at the school and the plan had still been that he would be going. "I was even getting ready right now," he added. I heard a thump. It sounded like he had punched something. "Dammit! I really wanted to see you, too! I miss your face."

"And the rest of the weekend is out?" I was biting my thumbnail. I didn't want to suggest going to see him tonight. The double bill was featuring Bottle Rocket and Rushmore, the first two of Anderson's flicks, and my personal favorites.

"Well, I'm working it. And I'm going to be exhausted, so I wouldn't get to spend the amount of time with you that I wanted to." He sounded really sad. I suddenly kicked myself for being a bad girlfriend and thinking of nothing but what I wanted.

"You're closing tomorrow night?" I asked.

"Yeah, and you're teaching during the day" I could hear him getting dressed as he spoke.

"Well, I could come by on your dinner break tomorrow. Ask if you can take an hour. We'll go somewhere. I'll even let you get dessert with your meal." I smiled around my words and tried to sound positive.

"Alright. It's not my first choice, but I'll settle for any chance of seeing you. Sorry again about the movie. Do you have enough time to find someone else to go with?"

"It's OK. I don't mind going by myself. And frankly, since I had been hoping to go with you, it would just make me miss you more if I went with someone else. The whole poor substitute thing." I heard him laugh. It made me smile.

"Alright. Well, enjoy yourself. I need to get going." And with that, he was off.

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I arrived at the theater and talked to the woman at the box office, giving her my name and explaining that tickets had been arranged for me. She pushed a piece of paper to me through the slot and I filled out my information. Other attendees were standing in line. I hadn't figured it on being as busy as it was. There was a good crowd forming. After she handed me my ticket, I turned around and was suddenly greeted with a sight that I was expecting even less than the size of the crowd.

Geoff looked down at me, his face washed in surprise. "Hey," he managed.

My mouth dropped open. Standing next to him was a gorgeous blonde with huge tits and a face slathered in make-up. She was gripping his arm tightly and yammering on about something. I couldn't focus on her words. I took a deep breath in and stepped sideways, away from him.

"Yeah, hey," was all I could get out. I moved toward the door and into the theater. My heart was beating a mile a minute. Inside, I walked up to the concession stand and ordered a large Coke, then proceeded to the theater and found myself a seat.

I tried not to glance over my shoulder, but I could hear the blonde's voice as they entered.

"Let's sit here," I heard her say, not feet from me. I casually turned my head to see her moving into the row behind me.

"How about we sit closer?" Geoff suggested. "Or further back."

"No, this looks good." She tugged at his hand and brought him down the row. They sat almost directly behind me. I shuddered.

"Are you sure you don't want to sit closer?" Geoff asked. His voice sounded like it was stuck in his throat.

"Yes," the blonde replied, her voice filled with aggravation. "I like it right here."

She then proceeded to launch into one of the most inane diatribes that I'd ever heard another human being speak. It revolved around her wondering just how true reality television was. She was of the opinion that you couldn't fake most of what you saw on screen and didn't understand why there were so many people who believed otherwise.

"Why would you want to fake any of that?" She asked, but it was clearly a question that she didn't want to hear answered, as she continued to chatter along until the lights dimmed and the screen lit up.

Over the next two hours I endured listening to her question everything that was happening. Every time that the theater would break out in laughter, it would be directly followed by a proclamation of "I don't get it." Further into the movie I heard her say "People actually like this shit?"

When the movie drew to a close, the lights came on for an intermission between titles. I hurried out to the lobby, mentally assessing the theater and trying to determine a different seat to sit in upon my return. I asked an employee if it would be OK to step out for a smoke and got permission to do so. As I was puffing away, I spied Geoff approaching me out of the corner of my eye. I grimaced and quickly glanced around for an escape route. There wasn't any time to run, and he was suddenly at my side.

"I know you don't owe me anything and I would even understand if you hauled off and hit me right now. But for the love of god, save me!" His voice was panic-stricken.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"That... that... woman," He used the word as if it tasted vile in his mouth. "I can't take it. Did you hear her? You had to have heard her. Jesus, I'm so sorry you had to have heard her. And you know how I loathe to apologize to you."

"Gee, thanks," was the best that I could muster.

"I need to get away from her," he continued. "Please help me."

"What the fuck do you want me to do?" I asked, incredulous.

"Something, anything, I don't care. You're smart. What could you do that would chase her off?" His face looked strained. I was tempted to believe that he was being heart felt.

"Why would I even want to help you?" I folded my arms across my chest.

"Chloe, the woman's favorite movie is Beaches. She talked about it non-stop on the way over here. I can't take it anymore." He looked as if he was going to reach out and touch me. I shrunk back.

"Really, Geoff. I don't know what you expect me to do." I flicked my cigarette aside and started to go back inside.

"You're going to have to watch Rushmore with her talking the entire time through it. You know you're not going to be able to find another seat. Imagine what having to listen to her through that will be like."

It made me stop. I closed my eyes and sighed. "Fine. I'll help. Where is she right now?"

"She had to use the restroom," he replied, then moved closer to me.

"Well, go back inside and wait for her then. She shouldn't see us talking if this is going to work." I looked at his face which was filling with hope. "I'll think of something. Just go inside and wait for her."

He walked in, looking back briefly and giving me a smile. I sighed and started to rack my brain over how I would pull off getting rid of the insipid airhead. I gritted my teeth over having to make nice with Geoff. I didn't think that I would be able to pull it off. There was still residual anger in me for what had gone on. But I couldn't sit through my movie with her prattling on.

Then a light came on inside my head. I smiled wickedly. The anger. Use the anger. I sauntered back into the theater just in time to see her exit the women's restroom.

"I don't understand why you said you liked this crap so much," her voice was nasally. I grit my teeth when I heard it. "The next one had better be better than the first one."

I could see Geoff gritting his own teeth. I walked up and gave him a solid push on the upper arm.

"Fucker. I can't believe you brought one of your fucking bimbos here!" I hissed, trying to keep my voice low and not attract attention.

"What?" The blonde was raising her ridiculously arched eyebrow at me. "Who the hell are you?"

"Shut the fuck up, slut," I addressed her. "I'm speaking to this asshole right here." I faced Geoff head on. "You really are something, you know that? Bringing a new girl here. To OUR theater. When you knew that I would be here."

"I didn't know that you were going to be here," Geoff played along.

"What the fuck is going on?" The blonde was turning between Geoff and me. "Geoff?"

"Like hell you didn't know I was going to be here. You know I love these movies. The first night we made love, you brought over Bottle Rocket and we watched it on DVD. Well, if you can even call what we did making love. Especially after what you did." I poked him in the chest. "I don't know what I ever saw in you."

"Geoff, who is this person?" The blonde sounded panicked. "How does she know you?"

"How do I know him?" I turned to her and gave her a solid push. "How do I know him? I'm the one that he's 'on a break' from. He told me that he needed some space. That he wanted to see other people. Of course, this is after he fucked me and then gave me that STD with that tiny little dick of his."

The blonde's mouth fell open. Her eyes went wide as she looked over at Geoff. He shifted around from foot to foot, letting his head hang down.

"It was treatable!" He meekly argued.

"Yes, but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable. You're such a coward. Did you even get treated? Or were you planning on unleashing it on the next unsuspecting girl? Like this stupid slut?" I was working up a tempo now, jabbing Geoff in the chest with my pointer finger. He was cringing in mock pain.

"Oh, that's just great. That's just fucking great!" The blonde was throwing her hands up. "I'm out of here!"

"I'll drive you home," Geoff said and began to move closer to her.

She jumped back a foot, out of the reach of his hand. "No, I don't want a ride from you. I'll call a cab. You can stay with this... this... person." She barked the last word at me. "I don't think I ever want to see you again."

Turning tail, the blonde strode out of the building, flipping open her cell phone as she went. Geoff clapped his hands loudly. "Halleluiah! Thank you so much!" He whipped in and hugged me before I had a chance to fight back. His genuine joy was palpable. I took a few seconds before pushing his arms off.

"Alright, whatever. I only did it so that I could watch the movie in peace. What the fuck were you doing with a chick that brainless, anyhow?" I straightened out my shirt, fussing more than I needed to.

"My boss set me up with her. She's the daughter of one of his friends." Geoff's smile was still fixed in place. We started to head toward the theater. He opened the door for me. I narrowed my gaze suspiciously and then decided to just let it go.

"Aren't you worried that it's going to get back to your boss?" I asked.

"Nah. He set me up with her because he was hoping I could get some information out of her about some merger going on at her dad's business. I knew 5 seconds after picking her up that she didn't know anything outside of make-up, hair and nails. What a fucking waste. Hot chick just is useless with no brain. At least when you try and date one, that is." Geoff stopped walking when he saw me enter my row. "You mind if I sit with you?"

"YES! I never agreed to sitting with you. I just said I would help you get rid of the moron. And I think that last part of what you said was rude. Why do you always say shit like that?" I stood at the start of the row, waiting for his answer before deciding to sit down.

"You think I actually MEAN everything I say? Jesus, Chloe. Can't a man joke? Have you no sense of humor?" He cocked his head and stared at me.

"I don't like your humor. I don't like all of the crass things you say all the time. It's part of the reason why I can't stand to be around you. You're so fucking smug," I tilted my head up at him.

"Fine. I'm smug. But there's no reason why either one of us should sit alone. It's just a damn seat. You won't even notice me. I don't talk during movies unless I'm at home," his brow had softened.

I closed my eyes and sighed. "I'm going to regret this..." I trailed off.

"OK, regret it later. Move over, the movie's about to start." Geoff pushed me down the row. I resumed my seat and he settled down next to me. Over the course of the next two hours, we watched the movie side by side, not talking to each other. Laughing in all the same spots.

It felt unbearably comfortable.