You Know You Can't Beat My BOB

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At one point in my life, there was a story about Bob's Big Boy and the trouble that ensued after a failed attempt at his capture. As time went by, more was added to that story. My life seemed to be plagued by the existence of Bobs. It was a tad disturbing for a awhile, but I've learned to embrace the Bob in my life these days. He's not just a Bob. He's a BOB.

BOB never complains that I am asking too much of him. He never thinks that I am too cynical or jaded. He doesn't leave the toilet seat up or the cap off of the toothpaste. He never drinks the last of the milk and he never complains when I eat the last of the ice cream. He understands his purpose is to serve me and insure my happiness.

BOB is around whenever I need him and never bitches about the length of time that I put him to work for. He gladly toils away until I am fully satisfied that the job has been done right. He never has a negative attitude and never asks if he can just watch the game instead. BOB is at my beck and call. He lives to please. He considers it his main mission in life.

True, there are times when BOB finally wears down and needs a little recharging time. But once his batteries are refreshed, he's right back at the ready once more, buzzing with excitement at the prospect of the next adventure that I will put him through. He is ready for the ins and outs of my demanding nature and goes to task .

BOB is unflagging in his drive to please me. I admire his ambition to try and make me climb to new heights. He lifts me up and holds me there, making sure that I can see the peaks of greatness. Once I have partaken in the joys that he has aided me in attaining, he goes quietly back to his designated spot and sits in silence until the next time that I deem his presence necessary.

BOB is the ultimate man.

He never thinks I'm fat. He never complains that I'm bitchy. He doesn't forget my birthday. in essence, BOB never disappoints. Which is becoming a concern of mine. I've grown so attached to BOB that I worry I'll never find another man remotely close to comparing with him.

I suppose there are things about BOB that I could live without. He makes an awful lot of noise at times and he never remembers to kiss me the way other men in my life have. BOB doesn't really hold up his end of a good conversation either. Plus, there are times when he's a little cold and needs some warming up.

But for the time being, BOB is the best possible fit for my life. He's the least demanding on me and comes with the least amount of baggage. I can live with fewer kisses, I suppose, if it means that he will always be there for the climax of my day.

So I guess it's just you and me for now, BOB. Care to join me for a shower?

Comments

BOB can coexist with a me

BOB can coexist with me. As long as my porn collection doesn't get fucked with!

Funny I call my "BOB"

Funny I call my "BOB" Rabbit. Oh Rabbit he is so pink and so fucking good.

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